The maps that leads to you (4/4)
Sep. 8th, 2014 11:27 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
wendyjolyTitle: The map that leads to you
Author: WendyJoly
Pairing : Guess who~
Rating: NC-17
Lenght : Chaptered
Beta : Uchiwas and penlights to![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
chibipinkpetals
Genre: Love, curiosity and mistery
Disclaimer: I owe nothing but Arashi owns surely my soul
Summary : When Ninomiya Kazunari crosses the path of a mysterious and rich man, buying pieces of Art like he buys groceries, he decides to solve the mystery, even if he had to draw himself the map that leads to him.
PART 4
He stays with me for several weeks after the big disclosure. I finally learn to know him as he really is, as Aiba knows him, certainly.
I discover his sense of humour and his amused look about Human beings, he who should be the most jaded. His sweetness and his compassion, everything which lead me to find him so precious. I force him to tell me some parts of his life, what he witnessed, like a living memory of humanity. Some vivid memories, for the biggest part, even if he kept nothing else than his pieces of Art. I finally understand his obsession for Master paintings. This is his own way to keep track of his past, to find companions able to survive to him and contrary to the rest of the world will be more precious by getting older. Immortal pieces like him.
Yet, there is a thing which is unchanged.
“You won’t come with me, Kazu.”
“Aiba is mortal too, he’s precious for you too, but you accept him by your side!”
“It’s different. I didn’t have any choice but to bring him along when he was a baby, we kept the habit. And…he’s trained.”
“Trained how?”
“Like…like a samurai.”
“Are you kidding me?”
“It was the safer way. Well…it was a very light training. He never cut a head or witnessed an execution.”
I should be really baffled because he laughs out loud and kisses me briefly.
”You’re cute.”
I should be piqued.
“So teach me too.”
“I beg your pardon?”
“Train me too.”
“You? But you’re an adult, Kazu!”
“I noticed thanks. But I already did judo when I was a kid…well, I was pretty good.”
When my head touches the floor painfully and I feel his knee on my chest, I immediately regret my remark. But it’s not enough to stop me, if it’s the only way to reassure him in order to let me travel with him around the world.
“So?” he smiles, visibly crazily amused.
“It’s only the lack of training only. Teach me.”
“I’ll be out of town for the 2 next weeks, I’ll ask to Aiba to show you some stuff.”
I nod, determined to win our freedom as a couple whatever the price could be. The next morning, Aiba wakes me up at dawn and I fall on Earth back…
Okay, I was certainly the ace of the judo club in my district when I was a kid but it has nothing to do with his training. I simply have the feeling he’s fighting for his life and I don’t even dare to imagine what would be a close combat against Sho. I understand too, why the adulthood could be a hindrance. Aiba possesses a philosophy I will never fully seize. His mind is mould since his childhood, like Sho’s and in spite of all the danger I met in my life, I’ve always been a victim, not a fighter.
But my love for him leads me and helps me to stand up each time Aiba makes me fall on the floor. I’m frustrated to be so weak when Sho comes back home.
Yet, when he jumps on me to nail me like the previous time, I don’t feel the usual pain and it’s a great victory. He looks at me, appreciatively and I feel a big wave of pride crimsoned my cheeks.
This daily training becomes my balance during the next months. I discipline myself, discovering unexpected resources in me and soon I forget that my first goal was to leave this house. He goes away less and less, and when he leaves it’s for short period only. He doesn’t even try to deny he loves me as strong as I love him. He never fails to surprise me.
We’re sitting in the library, reading books side by side but I can’t help gazing at him.
“With how many men did you live before me?”
“No one. You’re the first.”
“Hm?”
“I lived with two women. And you.”
“During 479 years?”
“I’m not a changeable man.”
He sounds almost offended and I laugh openly.
“But I already slept with a man, if it’s your real question.”
“When?”
“It was part of the samurai training. Well, not really an obligation, but they encouraged us implicitly. We did our sexual education between us.”
“And since…?”
“Not really.”
“Not really?”
“Never.”
“Ohh…” I don’t add anything, pinching my lips to swallow a conceited reaction.
“What?”
“Why me?”
“Honestly?” He takes off his glasses and intertwines his fingers in front of his mouth. “I don’t know. When I entered this casino, I felt your gaze, that’s all. It seemed obvious.”
“That’s why you accepted my proposal?”
“I hesitated. Not because I wasn’t tempted, rather because I was too much. I was afraid to fall in love.”
“It would have changed too many things?”
“Exactly.”
“And now?”
I approach him, on my all fours and I drop the last words on his lips.
“I try to enjoy the time we’re spending together without thinking further. Even if it’s hard…”
“Stop thinking.”
“I don’t know how to do this.”
“I’m gonna help you, I have a method.”
He smirks, a kinky look in the eyes, lying down on the big fluffy carpet, abandoning himself to my caresses.
- Ã -
We’ve been living together for almost a year when I’m strangely awoken.
“What are you doing here?”
Am I dreaming when I feel the little pink nose of my cat on my chin? I jump in our bed, looking for Sho to show him my pet but he’s leaned against the door, observing me maliciously.
“When did you get him?”
“I thought you missed him. Dress quickly, you have to pay the errand boy.”
I don’t think twice and leap on my feet, my cat in the arms. I kiss my lover and rush to the door. That’s the moment I run into Satoshi.
“What are you doing here…?”
“Matsumoto told me Canada was a wonderful country.”
I hold him tight, so happy to see my best friend in my kitchen when I wasn’t expecting him. Though, he’s the only man I know who never sounds to be surprised.
“When are you leaving?”
“Tomorrow. I hold an exhibition next week.”
“Where?”
“Shinjuku.”
“Classy.”
“You’ll come?”
“I…” I look at Sho who remains silent but wraps his arm around my waist. “We’ll talk about it.”
This night is extraordinary. Satoshi can’t get enough of the painting stories and we’re spending the end of the night in Sho’s museum. As I expected, Satoshi leaves the room when he has to go to the airport but he promises to come back as soon as possible. I wait for his departure to touch the subject.
“I know what you’re gonna say but~” I begin, but he cuts me.
“I won’t say no.”
“Are you…are you accepting?”
“I’m not against the idea.”
“It’s Tokyo.”
“I know.”
“You’re ready to go back in Japan?”
“I think it’s high time for me to mourn my past life and to move on.”
It’s too good to be true. I call my parents and announce them I’m going to introduce them the man of my life.
- Ã -
Sho is tensed like never before when we’re passing the security at Narita. I hold his hand and intertwine our fingers.
“Everything will be all right, my love.”
“I’ll feel better when we’ll be at home, I guess.”
Until the hotel, he’s on the look-out. I grab the keys of our two bedrooms and hand one to Aiba who sounds to be in his element. He hits on a pretty girl who smiles to him seductively.
Once the threshold passed, I fall on the bed, resting my tired body. Sho paces up and down the suites, looks outside and closes the curtains.
“What are you looking for?”
“I’m nervous.”
“Yeah, I noticed it, but why?”
“I have a bad feeling.”
“You think you’re a Jedi?”
“Not Jedi, samurai. Lucas stole everything from us.”
“As long as you joke, nothing is lost. Come here.”
I pat the bed and he sits unwillingly.
“We’re here for three days only, what could happen? We meet my parents, we’ll see Satoshi’s exhibition and we go back. Nothing more.”
“I fear nothing for me.”
“So I promise nothing will happen to me. I’ll take care of myself. Plus, you and Aiba are here to protect me…everything will be fine. How could you imagine I’d die when I just meet you?”
“You’re joking, Kazu but…”
“Sho, I promise I’ll stay with you.”
“You’d better be a man of his word.”
The next morning, we’re going to my parents place and they are delighted to finally meet Sho. Since my departure we’re exchanging mails and I can’t help but think they are worried for me. My decision was sudden and difficult to admit for them, they never imagined I was a romantic man, able to expatriate for a man he barely knew.
But Sho seduces them, like always. He’s delicate and protective, promising again and again he will make my life beautiful and happy. I smile, because he acts like a man who tries to convince a family to let a man marrying their daughter. My parents are simple people, concerned by my well-being rather than by etiquette and they are eventually reassured. I finally stopped my peregrinations to live with a liable man as Sho.
“Are you coming from the North of Japan?” He asks to my mother with a smile. He can’t help it…Mister Linguist…
“My great great mother, right. She left her hometown to meet the man who would become her husband and lived in Kansai. My husband’s family is from Osaka since 10 generations!”
He smirks to me and whispers a “we have much more in common than we thought.” And my mother asks where he was born. The conversation is animated and once again, I’m astonished by the way he sounds to be at ease. Impossible to believe he didn’t set a foot in Japan since centuries. My parents ask us to come back sometimes and Sho invites them at home.
Once inside the cab, he sighs and I can’t keep a chuckle for myself.
“What?!”
“So it was this, since the beginning? You were afraid to meet my parents?”
“It’s important, Kazunari.”
“You’re so old fashioned sometimes…you’re cute.”
“I’m certainly a lot of things but “cute” sounds definitely as a name-calling for me.”
“Sexy?”
“Hm…it’s better.”
“We have nothing to do until tomorrow evening.”
I stare at him suggestively, sliding my hand along his thigh.
“Stop staring at me this way. We’re not at home.”
“I’m euphoric. To be in Tokyo with you…I can’t help it.”
He puts his hand on mine and leads it higher on his crotch and it’s unbearable to wait for the hotel to kiss him.
- Ã -
The exhibition is a success. Amidst the crowd we come across Matsumoto who’s elbowed at the bar, conversing pleasantly with the gallery owner.
“Are you really here?” He mocks us openly.
“Satoshi is Kazunari’s best friend.”
“I know, Sho-kun…I simply thought you still were lost in your love frenzy, stuck in your snowy mountains…”
He smirks and teases our 'honeymoon' air but I like it. And this man knows definitely more than he wants to tell, like I thought.
“Did you see Satoshi?” He’s nowhere to be seen and I guess Mister Perfect should have a vague idea about the place he is.
He moves his chin, pointing the back of the gallery and he pushes a high chair to invite Sho to sit by his side. I leave them and look for the hero of the day.
Satoshi is hidden in a corner, observing the crowd. He almost jumps into my arms when he sees me coming to him.
“You did it!”
“Yeah, we couldn’t miss this. Sho is at the bar with Matsumoto.”
“I envy you, you know. I want a guy like him.”
“You? You are so fickle in love!”
“I know but I thought, perhaps a man, art expert, really handsome…”
“You have a crush for Matsumoto?” It’s obvious, I know him by heart and he never says anything innocently. And the presence of the auctioneer here is pretty suspicious. “You have an affair with him?!”
“Hush…it’s a secret.”
“Satoshi…”
“Go on, it’s been a long time since we’re sleeping together, even when you and me were pretty much together…” Frankly?! He’s discouraging.
“And?”
“I think I’m more into him than I thought.”
“He’s a lady killer.”
“And so? Me too! I’m fed up with those guys who think they have rights on me.”
“Okay…I give up. If you’re happy, that’s all it matters.”
“Thanks Nino.”
“And by the way, don’t mention our affair to Sho. He won’t forgive it.”
Side by side, Sho and Matsumoto sound to be seriously chatting.
“We have to go back to the hotel, Kazu.” I don’t even argue, I see something happened.
“Okay. Satoshi, sorry.”
“Don’t be. Thanks for coming, and Jun-kun will keep me company.”
“Good night.”
We go back to the hotel and I look at Sho undressing without a word; already naked on the bed, laid down on my stomach.
“Matsumoto told me there will be a great auction next week, here in Tokyo.”
“And that’s a problem?”
“The piece in question is the Klimt we own.”
“How?”
“Probably to attract me at Tokyo.”
“So it means they ignore you already are here.”
“Exactly. So we keep on this way. The less we’re seen, the better it is.”
“We’re…Stuck at the hotel?”
“Condemned to stay in our bed.”
“It’s a damn problem…” I smirk as he caresses the small of my back with his ringed hand.
“Indeed, what could we do?”
I roll over and naturally his hand rests on my belly. He leans on me and pecks my chin, the mole on it and my neck as my hand brushes his hair amorously. How could I be so crazy about him? Each time we’re making love I could burst a vessel.
“And if…we went to Paris next time?” He whispers at my ear.
“Like a honeymoon?”
He laughs and straddles me.
“Like a honeymoon. Now I met your parents, you could marry me…”
“Is it a proposition, Mister Sakurai?”
“It is, Mister Ninomiya.”
“In Paris?”
“In Paris.”
He resumes his delicious exploration and I suddenly freeze, making him straighten.
“Are you talking French?”
“Un petit peu.”
He doesn’t have a bit of accent and I melt. It’s so sexy…so erotic somehow.
“Would you have a fetish for French language?”
“A fetish I ignored, I swear…talk again.”
I nibble my thumb, excited beyond word by the little game he sounds to be ready to play.
“Je veux te faire l’amour.”
« Would you tell me what it means? »
“No way.”
“Again.”
He’s heavy on me and I close my eyes to enjoy the sensation.
“Did you know French people have the same word for kiss and fuck? One is a verb and the other a noun, though.”
I shake my head, blushing madly, this ‘fuck’ in his mouth so improperly exciting.
He kisses my lips delicately.
“Je te donne un baiser.”
I open my thighs to welcome him, impatient to feel him inside me, my hard member already dripping precum eagerly. I don’t even need preparation; we made love all night long yesterday and this afternoon before the exhibition. He thrusts in me deeply and I cry my pleasure, clinging on him as if there will be no tomorrow.
“Et je te baise.” One, two, three passionate thrusts and I’m in paradise.
“So fuck me harder.” I mumble at his ear and he seizes my ass to feel me stronger and deeper. I can’t get enough of the love he has for me like I can’t get enough of the love I have for him, even if we’re walking on a thin rope, trying our best to forget the time it left to us.
- Ã -
I can’t sleep this night, too excited. My parents, the exhibition, Satoshi who sounds finally in love, Sho’s proposal.
I stare at Sho, lying on his stomach, in his splendid nudity and I caress the curve of his buttocks slowly. I won’t ever get enough of it and I feel so lucky for having met him, even if my little interior voice shouts to me I’m such an egotist. He will always be by my side until the day of my death, won’t ever be sick and won’t ever give up on me. What am I offering in exchange? Nothing else than a humanity which will separate us one day. I go drink a glass of water and I grab my cell phone, checking it out, staring at the numerous messages Satoshi already left. I dial his number back.
“Yeah?”
“He left me, Nino.”
“What?”
“Matsumoto. He left with a girl of the gallery. I talked about our relationship and he freaked out…would you come at my place?”
I take a glance at the bed where my lover is sleeping.
“I can’t, Toshi, but come to the hotel. We’ll talk at the bar.”
“I’m on my way.”
I dress and half an hour later, climb down at the bar after leaving a note to Sho. He won’t wake up soon, but I don’t want to take a risk. Ten minutes later, a shattered Satoshi passes the threshold and sits by my side. I order vodka for him and a tea for me.
“So?”
“You see, that’s exactly why I refuse any commitment. Each time I take a risk, I’m hurt.”
“What happened?”
“When you left, we chatted and I ask him to spend the night with me.”
“He refused?”
“Yeah.”
“How do you proceed usually?”
“We meet in a hotel, always the same.”
“He’s a man of habit.” I say ironically.
“I care about him, Nino, really.”
It’s the very first time he’s so sad and I’m sincerely confused. I feel almost guilty to be so happy with Sho.
“Perhaps did he refuse, it doesn’t mean he won’t see you.”
“We never established rules, it’s kind of tacit agreement. I know he’s charming, he sees women too, but…when we’re together, he’s all mine. It’s so different from my usual lovers.”
“Thanks.”
“You were one of your kind, Nino. If I would have had a chance with you, I would have tried my luck.”
“Satoshi…I didn’t know…”
“We would have been together and the day you would have crossed Sakurai’s path, you would have dumped me.”
We’re laughing but I feel bad.
“Nino!”
“What?”
He takes off his cell phone and hands it to me.
“This is him.”
“Answer, baka!”
“Yeah? Okay.”
He hangs up and smiles brightly.
“He’s waiting for me in front of my door.”
“So go, what are you waiting for?”
“I’ll grab a cab.”
We exit the bar together and I hug him, ready to go back to Sho. But a man pulls Satoshi’s sleeve and he has the look my friend had early. Sad and hurt.
“That’s him?” Spit the guy furiously.
“You followed me again? I asked you to stop, don’t you understand? Nino is my best friend and it’s none of your business.”
“Satoshi?”
“He stalks me, we went out months ago, but it’s over.”
I try to understand the situation, obviously this man was one of the lovers Satoshi talked to me early. Feeling the employee’s gazes on me, I step forward; I don’t want to be noticed.
“Perhaps should we go to the bar, we could talk.”
“Mind your own business!!”
Those are his last words then he takes out a gun from his pocket and shoots me, right in the chest. I feel the awful pain, the way my legs are flinching and I hear the cries around. Satoshi screams, asking for an ambulance, I see the guy running away and a woman stares at me, her hands hiding her mouth.
Sho. I want Sho. I can’t die before seeing him a last time. And suddenly he’s here. He takes me in his arms and I’m in peace, serene.
“You promised, Nino. You promised me.”
I see his tears and his hands covered by blood.
“Don’t leave me. Not now…”
“I’m so sorry, Sho.”
Suddenly, I’m desperate. I don’t want to leave him and break his heart after all the promises I made to him. It’s so idiotic to die here, where there was no danger. I blame myself to have been so careless, to have offered him only one year of love. It’s so unfair, so…everything is dark and when I pass out, I can only hear the screams of the man I love.
When I finally regain conscious, I’m in a white room. A hospital? This so characteristic odour of cleanness wakes me up.
I try to straighten but my chest hurts like Hell and my empty lungs are painfully fulfilled.
I breathe for a few minutes and try to rise again. I’m not dead after all. I believed so much I left him…
I try to recognize the room where I am. Certainly intensive cares. All those noises sound to be confusing and far away. On the table the picture of my grandfather. My grandfather? What’s with this? I straighten cautiously and freeze when I figure out I’m at my parent’s place.
How much time since the incident? Where is Sho? He will be so happy to see me, even if I guess our travel to Paris is cancelled. Whatever, he was right, that’s all it matters. Even the best samurai can’t stop a bullet…
I’m wearing a suit? Well…my mother can be so strange sometimes. I go down to the living room as if I was running a marathon. My members are like cardboard, like that time when I was freezing.
I hear voices from the living room, Aiba, my parents, Sho and…Satoshi?!
I lean against the wall and step forward to take a glance.
Satoshi notices me first and he falls on a chair, dead blank. My mother grabs him and screams when she sees me.
“Mum…”
Sho raises his gaze and I have the feeling to live the scene in slow motion. He’s a walking dead, devastated by sadness. I wonder since how many time he didn’t eat or sleep.
“You will be sick if you don’t sleep.”
He opens his mouth but doesn't say anything. I smile, happy to be able to comfort him.
“I’m fine, Sho, I’m just starved. Go on, stop it already with those faces. I’m fine!”
Sho rushes on me and opens my shirt, embarrassing me. I try to move but he nails me to the wall and puts a trembling hand on my chest.
“You’re dead, Kazu.”
“Of course, I’m not. I’m here, in front of you.”
“Three days ago, you fell on the hotel’s floor after having been shot by a stalker.”
I remember but…I touch my chest where a scar like a star is drawn. I’m dead? No one could survive to a bullet in the heart. They are looking at me as if I was a monster.
“I’m not a ghost. I swear.”
My father approaches me and sobs in my arms. Then the others kiss me, touch me, touch the mark on my chest and my heart which beats firmly.
I want Sho. Where is he? He comes back to me, grips my hand and I shout when a blade pierces my palm. The blood flows on my wrist and soil the floor but when I look at my hand, no trace left.
“How…” His eyes don’t dare believing, but we know, the both of us.
This mad attraction, the recognition between us, in spite of the centuries.
I hold him tight, he sounds so fragile suddenly, so confused. They are looking at us and only Aiba smiles. I feel Sho’s tears wetting my neck and I kiss his temple and murmurs at his ear.
“I’m sorry for making you wait.”
That's all folks ^@^
Author: WendyJoly
Pairing : Guess who~
Rating: NC-17
Lenght : Chaptered
Beta : Uchiwas and penlights to
chibipinkpetalsGenre: Love, curiosity and mistery
Disclaimer: I owe nothing but Arashi owns surely my soul
Summary : When Ninomiya Kazunari crosses the path of a mysterious and rich man, buying pieces of Art like he buys groceries, he decides to solve the mystery, even if he had to draw himself the map that leads to him.
PART 4
He stays with me for several weeks after the big disclosure. I finally learn to know him as he really is, as Aiba knows him, certainly.
I discover his sense of humour and his amused look about Human beings, he who should be the most jaded. His sweetness and his compassion, everything which lead me to find him so precious. I force him to tell me some parts of his life, what he witnessed, like a living memory of humanity. Some vivid memories, for the biggest part, even if he kept nothing else than his pieces of Art. I finally understand his obsession for Master paintings. This is his own way to keep track of his past, to find companions able to survive to him and contrary to the rest of the world will be more precious by getting older. Immortal pieces like him.
Yet, there is a thing which is unchanged.
“You won’t come with me, Kazu.”
“Aiba is mortal too, he’s precious for you too, but you accept him by your side!”
“It’s different. I didn’t have any choice but to bring him along when he was a baby, we kept the habit. And…he’s trained.”
“Trained how?”
“Like…like a samurai.”
“Are you kidding me?”
“It was the safer way. Well…it was a very light training. He never cut a head or witnessed an execution.”
I should be really baffled because he laughs out loud and kisses me briefly.
”You’re cute.”
I should be piqued.
“So teach me too.”
“I beg your pardon?”
“Train me too.”
“You? But you’re an adult, Kazu!”
“I noticed thanks. But I already did judo when I was a kid…well, I was pretty good.”
When my head touches the floor painfully and I feel his knee on my chest, I immediately regret my remark. But it’s not enough to stop me, if it’s the only way to reassure him in order to let me travel with him around the world.
“So?” he smiles, visibly crazily amused.
“It’s only the lack of training only. Teach me.”
“I’ll be out of town for the 2 next weeks, I’ll ask to Aiba to show you some stuff.”
I nod, determined to win our freedom as a couple whatever the price could be. The next morning, Aiba wakes me up at dawn and I fall on Earth back…
Okay, I was certainly the ace of the judo club in my district when I was a kid but it has nothing to do with his training. I simply have the feeling he’s fighting for his life and I don’t even dare to imagine what would be a close combat against Sho. I understand too, why the adulthood could be a hindrance. Aiba possesses a philosophy I will never fully seize. His mind is mould since his childhood, like Sho’s and in spite of all the danger I met in my life, I’ve always been a victim, not a fighter.
But my love for him leads me and helps me to stand up each time Aiba makes me fall on the floor. I’m frustrated to be so weak when Sho comes back home.
Yet, when he jumps on me to nail me like the previous time, I don’t feel the usual pain and it’s a great victory. He looks at me, appreciatively and I feel a big wave of pride crimsoned my cheeks.
This daily training becomes my balance during the next months. I discipline myself, discovering unexpected resources in me and soon I forget that my first goal was to leave this house. He goes away less and less, and when he leaves it’s for short period only. He doesn’t even try to deny he loves me as strong as I love him. He never fails to surprise me.
We’re sitting in the library, reading books side by side but I can’t help gazing at him.
“With how many men did you live before me?”
“No one. You’re the first.”
“Hm?”
“I lived with two women. And you.”
“During 479 years?”
“I’m not a changeable man.”
He sounds almost offended and I laugh openly.
“But I already slept with a man, if it’s your real question.”
“When?”
“It was part of the samurai training. Well, not really an obligation, but they encouraged us implicitly. We did our sexual education between us.”
“And since…?”
“Not really.”
“Not really?”
“Never.”
“Ohh…” I don’t add anything, pinching my lips to swallow a conceited reaction.
“What?”
“Why me?”
“Honestly?” He takes off his glasses and intertwines his fingers in front of his mouth. “I don’t know. When I entered this casino, I felt your gaze, that’s all. It seemed obvious.”
“That’s why you accepted my proposal?”
“I hesitated. Not because I wasn’t tempted, rather because I was too much. I was afraid to fall in love.”
“It would have changed too many things?”
“Exactly.”
“And now?”
I approach him, on my all fours and I drop the last words on his lips.
“I try to enjoy the time we’re spending together without thinking further. Even if it’s hard…”
“Stop thinking.”
“I don’t know how to do this.”
“I’m gonna help you, I have a method.”
He smirks, a kinky look in the eyes, lying down on the big fluffy carpet, abandoning himself to my caresses.
We’ve been living together for almost a year when I’m strangely awoken.
“What are you doing here?”
Am I dreaming when I feel the little pink nose of my cat on my chin? I jump in our bed, looking for Sho to show him my pet but he’s leaned against the door, observing me maliciously.
“When did you get him?”
“I thought you missed him. Dress quickly, you have to pay the errand boy.”
I don’t think twice and leap on my feet, my cat in the arms. I kiss my lover and rush to the door. That’s the moment I run into Satoshi.
“What are you doing here…?”
“Matsumoto told me Canada was a wonderful country.”
I hold him tight, so happy to see my best friend in my kitchen when I wasn’t expecting him. Though, he’s the only man I know who never sounds to be surprised.
“When are you leaving?”
“Tomorrow. I hold an exhibition next week.”
“Where?”
“Shinjuku.”
“Classy.”
“You’ll come?”
“I…” I look at Sho who remains silent but wraps his arm around my waist. “We’ll talk about it.”
This night is extraordinary. Satoshi can’t get enough of the painting stories and we’re spending the end of the night in Sho’s museum. As I expected, Satoshi leaves the room when he has to go to the airport but he promises to come back as soon as possible. I wait for his departure to touch the subject.
“I know what you’re gonna say but~” I begin, but he cuts me.
“I won’t say no.”
“Are you…are you accepting?”
“I’m not against the idea.”
“It’s Tokyo.”
“I know.”
“You’re ready to go back in Japan?”
“I think it’s high time for me to mourn my past life and to move on.”
It’s too good to be true. I call my parents and announce them I’m going to introduce them the man of my life.
Sho is tensed like never before when we’re passing the security at Narita. I hold his hand and intertwine our fingers.
“Everything will be all right, my love.”
“I’ll feel better when we’ll be at home, I guess.”
Until the hotel, he’s on the look-out. I grab the keys of our two bedrooms and hand one to Aiba who sounds to be in his element. He hits on a pretty girl who smiles to him seductively.
Once the threshold passed, I fall on the bed, resting my tired body. Sho paces up and down the suites, looks outside and closes the curtains.
“What are you looking for?”
“I’m nervous.”
“Yeah, I noticed it, but why?”
“I have a bad feeling.”
“You think you’re a Jedi?”
“Not Jedi, samurai. Lucas stole everything from us.”
“As long as you joke, nothing is lost. Come here.”
I pat the bed and he sits unwillingly.
“We’re here for three days only, what could happen? We meet my parents, we’ll see Satoshi’s exhibition and we go back. Nothing more.”
“I fear nothing for me.”
“So I promise nothing will happen to me. I’ll take care of myself. Plus, you and Aiba are here to protect me…everything will be fine. How could you imagine I’d die when I just meet you?”
“You’re joking, Kazu but…”
“Sho, I promise I’ll stay with you.”
“You’d better be a man of his word.”
The next morning, we’re going to my parents place and they are delighted to finally meet Sho. Since my departure we’re exchanging mails and I can’t help but think they are worried for me. My decision was sudden and difficult to admit for them, they never imagined I was a romantic man, able to expatriate for a man he barely knew.
But Sho seduces them, like always. He’s delicate and protective, promising again and again he will make my life beautiful and happy. I smile, because he acts like a man who tries to convince a family to let a man marrying their daughter. My parents are simple people, concerned by my well-being rather than by etiquette and they are eventually reassured. I finally stopped my peregrinations to live with a liable man as Sho.
“Are you coming from the North of Japan?” He asks to my mother with a smile. He can’t help it…Mister Linguist…
“My great great mother, right. She left her hometown to meet the man who would become her husband and lived in Kansai. My husband’s family is from Osaka since 10 generations!”
He smirks to me and whispers a “we have much more in common than we thought.” And my mother asks where he was born. The conversation is animated and once again, I’m astonished by the way he sounds to be at ease. Impossible to believe he didn’t set a foot in Japan since centuries. My parents ask us to come back sometimes and Sho invites them at home.
Once inside the cab, he sighs and I can’t keep a chuckle for myself.
“What?!”
“So it was this, since the beginning? You were afraid to meet my parents?”
“It’s important, Kazunari.”
“You’re so old fashioned sometimes…you’re cute.”
“I’m certainly a lot of things but “cute” sounds definitely as a name-calling for me.”
“Sexy?”
“Hm…it’s better.”
“We have nothing to do until tomorrow evening.”
I stare at him suggestively, sliding my hand along his thigh.
“Stop staring at me this way. We’re not at home.”
“I’m euphoric. To be in Tokyo with you…I can’t help it.”
He puts his hand on mine and leads it higher on his crotch and it’s unbearable to wait for the hotel to kiss him.
The exhibition is a success. Amidst the crowd we come across Matsumoto who’s elbowed at the bar, conversing pleasantly with the gallery owner.
“Are you really here?” He mocks us openly.
“Satoshi is Kazunari’s best friend.”
“I know, Sho-kun…I simply thought you still were lost in your love frenzy, stuck in your snowy mountains…”
He smirks and teases our 'honeymoon' air but I like it. And this man knows definitely more than he wants to tell, like I thought.
“Did you see Satoshi?” He’s nowhere to be seen and I guess Mister Perfect should have a vague idea about the place he is.
He moves his chin, pointing the back of the gallery and he pushes a high chair to invite Sho to sit by his side. I leave them and look for the hero of the day.
Satoshi is hidden in a corner, observing the crowd. He almost jumps into my arms when he sees me coming to him.
“You did it!”
“Yeah, we couldn’t miss this. Sho is at the bar with Matsumoto.”
“I envy you, you know. I want a guy like him.”
“You? You are so fickle in love!”
“I know but I thought, perhaps a man, art expert, really handsome…”
“You have a crush for Matsumoto?” It’s obvious, I know him by heart and he never says anything innocently. And the presence of the auctioneer here is pretty suspicious. “You have an affair with him?!”
“Hush…it’s a secret.”
“Satoshi…”
“Go on, it’s been a long time since we’re sleeping together, even when you and me were pretty much together…” Frankly?! He’s discouraging.
“And?”
“I think I’m more into him than I thought.”
“He’s a lady killer.”
“And so? Me too! I’m fed up with those guys who think they have rights on me.”
“Okay…I give up. If you’re happy, that’s all it matters.”
“Thanks Nino.”
“And by the way, don’t mention our affair to Sho. He won’t forgive it.”
Side by side, Sho and Matsumoto sound to be seriously chatting.
“We have to go back to the hotel, Kazu.” I don’t even argue, I see something happened.
“Okay. Satoshi, sorry.”
“Don’t be. Thanks for coming, and Jun-kun will keep me company.”
“Good night.”
We go back to the hotel and I look at Sho undressing without a word; already naked on the bed, laid down on my stomach.
“Matsumoto told me there will be a great auction next week, here in Tokyo.”
“And that’s a problem?”
“The piece in question is the Klimt we own.”
“How?”
“Probably to attract me at Tokyo.”
“So it means they ignore you already are here.”
“Exactly. So we keep on this way. The less we’re seen, the better it is.”
“We’re…Stuck at the hotel?”
“Condemned to stay in our bed.”
“It’s a damn problem…” I smirk as he caresses the small of my back with his ringed hand.
“Indeed, what could we do?”
I roll over and naturally his hand rests on my belly. He leans on me and pecks my chin, the mole on it and my neck as my hand brushes his hair amorously. How could I be so crazy about him? Each time we’re making love I could burst a vessel.
“And if…we went to Paris next time?” He whispers at my ear.
“Like a honeymoon?”
He laughs and straddles me.
“Like a honeymoon. Now I met your parents, you could marry me…”
“Is it a proposition, Mister Sakurai?”
“It is, Mister Ninomiya.”
“In Paris?”
“In Paris.”
He resumes his delicious exploration and I suddenly freeze, making him straighten.
“Are you talking French?”
“Un petit peu.”
He doesn’t have a bit of accent and I melt. It’s so sexy…so erotic somehow.
“Would you have a fetish for French language?”
“A fetish I ignored, I swear…talk again.”
I nibble my thumb, excited beyond word by the little game he sounds to be ready to play.
“Je veux te faire l’amour.”
« Would you tell me what it means? »
“No way.”
“Again.”
He’s heavy on me and I close my eyes to enjoy the sensation.
“Did you know French people have the same word for kiss and fuck? One is a verb and the other a noun, though.”
I shake my head, blushing madly, this ‘fuck’ in his mouth so improperly exciting.
He kisses my lips delicately.
“Je te donne un baiser.”
I open my thighs to welcome him, impatient to feel him inside me, my hard member already dripping precum eagerly. I don’t even need preparation; we made love all night long yesterday and this afternoon before the exhibition. He thrusts in me deeply and I cry my pleasure, clinging on him as if there will be no tomorrow.
“Et je te baise.” One, two, three passionate thrusts and I’m in paradise.
“So fuck me harder.” I mumble at his ear and he seizes my ass to feel me stronger and deeper. I can’t get enough of the love he has for me like I can’t get enough of the love I have for him, even if we’re walking on a thin rope, trying our best to forget the time it left to us.
I can’t sleep this night, too excited. My parents, the exhibition, Satoshi who sounds finally in love, Sho’s proposal.
I stare at Sho, lying on his stomach, in his splendid nudity and I caress the curve of his buttocks slowly. I won’t ever get enough of it and I feel so lucky for having met him, even if my little interior voice shouts to me I’m such an egotist. He will always be by my side until the day of my death, won’t ever be sick and won’t ever give up on me. What am I offering in exchange? Nothing else than a humanity which will separate us one day. I go drink a glass of water and I grab my cell phone, checking it out, staring at the numerous messages Satoshi already left. I dial his number back.
“Yeah?”
“He left me, Nino.”
“What?”
“Matsumoto. He left with a girl of the gallery. I talked about our relationship and he freaked out…would you come at my place?”
I take a glance at the bed where my lover is sleeping.
“I can’t, Toshi, but come to the hotel. We’ll talk at the bar.”
“I’m on my way.”
I dress and half an hour later, climb down at the bar after leaving a note to Sho. He won’t wake up soon, but I don’t want to take a risk. Ten minutes later, a shattered Satoshi passes the threshold and sits by my side. I order vodka for him and a tea for me.
“So?”
“You see, that’s exactly why I refuse any commitment. Each time I take a risk, I’m hurt.”
“What happened?”
“When you left, we chatted and I ask him to spend the night with me.”
“He refused?”
“Yeah.”
“How do you proceed usually?”
“We meet in a hotel, always the same.”
“He’s a man of habit.” I say ironically.
“I care about him, Nino, really.”
It’s the very first time he’s so sad and I’m sincerely confused. I feel almost guilty to be so happy with Sho.
“Perhaps did he refuse, it doesn’t mean he won’t see you.”
“We never established rules, it’s kind of tacit agreement. I know he’s charming, he sees women too, but…when we’re together, he’s all mine. It’s so different from my usual lovers.”
“Thanks.”
“You were one of your kind, Nino. If I would have had a chance with you, I would have tried my luck.”
“Satoshi…I didn’t know…”
“We would have been together and the day you would have crossed Sakurai’s path, you would have dumped me.”
We’re laughing but I feel bad.
“Nino!”
“What?”
He takes off his cell phone and hands it to me.
“This is him.”
“Answer, baka!”
“Yeah? Okay.”
He hangs up and smiles brightly.
“He’s waiting for me in front of my door.”
“So go, what are you waiting for?”
“I’ll grab a cab.”
We exit the bar together and I hug him, ready to go back to Sho. But a man pulls Satoshi’s sleeve and he has the look my friend had early. Sad and hurt.
“That’s him?” Spit the guy furiously.
“You followed me again? I asked you to stop, don’t you understand? Nino is my best friend and it’s none of your business.”
“Satoshi?”
“He stalks me, we went out months ago, but it’s over.”
I try to understand the situation, obviously this man was one of the lovers Satoshi talked to me early. Feeling the employee’s gazes on me, I step forward; I don’t want to be noticed.
“Perhaps should we go to the bar, we could talk.”
“Mind your own business!!”
Those are his last words then he takes out a gun from his pocket and shoots me, right in the chest. I feel the awful pain, the way my legs are flinching and I hear the cries around. Satoshi screams, asking for an ambulance, I see the guy running away and a woman stares at me, her hands hiding her mouth.
Sho. I want Sho. I can’t die before seeing him a last time. And suddenly he’s here. He takes me in his arms and I’m in peace, serene.
“You promised, Nino. You promised me.”
I see his tears and his hands covered by blood.
“Don’t leave me. Not now…”
“I’m so sorry, Sho.”
Suddenly, I’m desperate. I don’t want to leave him and break his heart after all the promises I made to him. It’s so idiotic to die here, where there was no danger. I blame myself to have been so careless, to have offered him only one year of love. It’s so unfair, so…everything is dark and when I pass out, I can only hear the screams of the man I love.
When I finally regain conscious, I’m in a white room. A hospital? This so characteristic odour of cleanness wakes me up.
I try to straighten but my chest hurts like Hell and my empty lungs are painfully fulfilled.
I breathe for a few minutes and try to rise again. I’m not dead after all. I believed so much I left him…
I try to recognize the room where I am. Certainly intensive cares. All those noises sound to be confusing and far away. On the table the picture of my grandfather. My grandfather? What’s with this? I straighten cautiously and freeze when I figure out I’m at my parent’s place.
How much time since the incident? Where is Sho? He will be so happy to see me, even if I guess our travel to Paris is cancelled. Whatever, he was right, that’s all it matters. Even the best samurai can’t stop a bullet…
I’m wearing a suit? Well…my mother can be so strange sometimes. I go down to the living room as if I was running a marathon. My members are like cardboard, like that time when I was freezing.
I hear voices from the living room, Aiba, my parents, Sho and…Satoshi?!
I lean against the wall and step forward to take a glance.
Satoshi notices me first and he falls on a chair, dead blank. My mother grabs him and screams when she sees me.
“Mum…”
Sho raises his gaze and I have the feeling to live the scene in slow motion. He’s a walking dead, devastated by sadness. I wonder since how many time he didn’t eat or sleep.
“You will be sick if you don’t sleep.”
He opens his mouth but doesn't say anything. I smile, happy to be able to comfort him.
“I’m fine, Sho, I’m just starved. Go on, stop it already with those faces. I’m fine!”
Sho rushes on me and opens my shirt, embarrassing me. I try to move but he nails me to the wall and puts a trembling hand on my chest.
“You’re dead, Kazu.”
“Of course, I’m not. I’m here, in front of you.”
“Three days ago, you fell on the hotel’s floor after having been shot by a stalker.”
I remember but…I touch my chest where a scar like a star is drawn. I’m dead? No one could survive to a bullet in the heart. They are looking at me as if I was a monster.
“I’m not a ghost. I swear.”
My father approaches me and sobs in my arms. Then the others kiss me, touch me, touch the mark on my chest and my heart which beats firmly.
I want Sho. Where is he? He comes back to me, grips my hand and I shout when a blade pierces my palm. The blood flows on my wrist and soil the floor but when I look at my hand, no trace left.
“How…” His eyes don’t dare believing, but we know, the both of us.
This mad attraction, the recognition between us, in spite of the centuries.
I hold him tight, he sounds so fragile suddenly, so confused. They are looking at us and only Aiba smiles. I feel Sho’s tears wetting my neck and I kiss his temple and murmurs at his ear.
“I’m sorry for making you wait.”
That's all folks ^@^
